But he’s not the right type of 1%. The type that plays the game and tows the line. He can’t be herded but does whatever he and he alone wants to do. He is too unstable for them.

“Binders full of women” is like, “Oh, that crazy Uncle Mitt” when you have a presumptive nominee tweeting that his female opponent can’t sexually satisfy her husband.

I’m trying to comfort myself with the idea that the mostly likely scenarios for a Trump presidency are:
1. He gives a state of the union address every night were he brags about great he is.
2. He actually tries to govern and gets impeached in the first three weeks.

I don’t want the Dems to get too cocky and think this election will be a cakewalk. I want to see whomever the Dem nominee working their ass off this campaign season and not take Trump for granted.

Wasn’t Romney’s father born in Mexico??

I miss Romney and I am a Mexican immigrant! I MISS ROMNEY!! This is what The Donald and Cruz have done.

What flavor soup best compliments the bitter taste of failure?

One down, one to go.

The sheer giddiness I’m getting from Candidate Serial Killer’s crushing failure is mixing poorly in my gut with abject terror at the reality that we very well may see Trump in the White House.

I’ll almost miss Ted Cruz. Hating him has been a fun hobby this primary season.

Look it's hard taking a human form. God. Give Ted a break.

Ted Cruz is DEFINITELY not the zodiac killer. He wasn’t even on this planet yet. So can we stop this ridiculousness! Everyone knows getting here from Gorrhruop takes at least a thousand years. And like once he got here he was so busy murdering neighborhood dogs and drinking the blood of ten thousand squirrels that he…

“Well, I’ve been married to him 15 years, and I know pretty well who he is, and please help me god someone please help me”

Someone help Hedi and her children escape.

second rule of politics:

Recently had one of my crazy “Bernie is a saint and Hillary is the devil” friends say that “Hillary isn’t a real woman and we should find a real woman we can elect.” I was so enraged I couldn’t even respond.

THAT LAST TWEET THO

WHEW.