Pitaro was hoisted by his own Le Batard.

“Ja! Ja! Ihre Wurst ist so groß!”

now you have something new to talk about with your therapist.  

Would you know it’s Hitler? Or does it just sound like some Austrian guy going at it? Because I have to imagine that just hearing German sex in general is pretty harrowing. 

He argued that the home sale was just an épée-phenomenon.

Tanguy

I’m sure the Boston fans will treat a Muslim player well.

How much meth/opioids do you have to do to not notice a yellow jacket nest hanging off the eave of your front porch before it gets 1/100th that size and remove it? I’ve suffered a few yellow jacket encounters and cohabitation isn’t an option.

Pretty sure this is actually a list of Bristol Palin’s exes.

Instead of a red flag, it should be a red glove, and instead of triggering replay review, it will trigger a fight between the two head coaches.

Boeing’s answer to Airline Pilots:

Daughter 1: Goddamn it dad, I knew you were up to something. Why couldn’t you just let D2 fail on her own merits?
D2: Wait, what’s happening? Why are you yelling at dad? 

“Nobody believed in us.”

And in all that time, how often has a fan been killed by a ball that stayed in the field of play?

Man, the one time a Dodgers fan stays for the 9th. 

Well c’mon, all those Browns do look alike.

And yet--even with all that time!--Reid will still mismanage his timeouts.

Please. You’re going to need a lot more “No Senor’s” than that if you’re ever going to compete with me on Latino speed-dating night.

“Rickie Ricardo”

Easy, because he has Rx in his name.