Gabe, god dammit im ready. Put a helmet and cup on me and I’ll roundhouse the butter long and true. How hard can it be? They put it in front of you, and you kick it to hell. It’s no different than your little trash can on a Monday. You’ve been preparing for this your entire professional career. And there is glory to…

Coincidentally, Lonely Master was 2/3 of my high school nickname.

Smart seems like he’s ‘bout that life. Embiid seems like he’s ‘bout Twitter.

But the very best part of this is Smart looking not even the least bit concerned about huge-ass Embiid angrily rushing him as refs and various teammates scrambled to cut off his approach...Smart has been in enough of these to know that most of them end with the would-be brawlers being conveniently separated just in…

He’s a long way from the Stadium of Light!

The amount of work Olivier Giroud has been doing for this team is unbelievable. Throughout this World Cup, he has been great at passing the ball, creating space for his partners AND playing defensively like never before in his career. Plus, today he created the corner from which France scored their only goal. Calling…

Fair points, but I’d still go with Brazil + Ronaldo.

I legitimately did not know that calling a blog on the telephone was actually possible (much less something that people do).

I wish I had the energy now that George Soros has in his late 80s. That man is so busy planning bus routes for illegal immigrants to raid voting booths, training crisis actors like David Hogg, and now running sport blogs, I don’t know how he finds time to pimp underage sex slaves to Bill Clinton.

In the internet age, it’s rare to see a telephone toughguy anymore.

Had good money on a “GET OFF THE PHONE/SHUT UP MOM!” moment in there.

We arrived at work this morning to find this fantastic message, left by a caller in the Bay Area

It’s like my dad always says, [three minute voicemail of car noises and AM radio, muffled by his pocket].

2.05 ERA: Hey, that’s pretty nice.

So I see she’s already had some coffee.

Serves the Tim Horton’s worker right for asking her how she felt about fellow Canadian James Paxton recently throwing a no-hitter on Canadian soil.

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

I kept reading it as Moist Thigh.

im the guy throwing the glove at the pile and running away

This is all backwards. The key to breaking the Marginot Line was crossing the Ardenneado.