New election week drinking game:

#BestWords

Both of my horrible father-in-law’s wives (his first wife, and his current wife) suffer from this, and I highly suspect anorexia before it. Either he has a type, or his life-long fat-shaming of all the women in this family (including me) has exacted quite a toll indeed.

So much cheese. Much ocean.

“Not that it’s anyone’s business, but I did not make a decision to alter my face and have surgery on my eyes.”

Many years ago I had a similar notion. Having traveled by rail for 24 straight hours, as a weary traveler the thought miraculously occurred to me while taking a perfectly lovely hot shower at peak rush hour in a London Underground station. I thought, “Dear god, this is lovely. Why on earth can’t I do this in an…

I would like to formally nominate you for my lab partner.

I’m no Swift fan, but standing up for yourself when some horrible (married) guy publicly says that they think they’ll fuck you AND that they’re the real reason you made it AND that you’re a bitch?

Don’t like his music, fine. Cringe away. To each his own. There’s plenty of music out there that is, to my ear, unlistenable.

In my head, I always read all her tweets in the voice of a hyper Liza Minelli thanking the audience for having just won an award. And then suddenly it all makes sense.

Tangentially... by a show of hands, does anyone out there think naming products (or people) random words spelled words backwards is still clever? Asking for my friend, Nevaeh.

At the end of the day, all rapists — alleged or otherwise — come from one place:

Sounds like Shane’s life threatening illness might be having Sinead O’Connor as his mom.

I feel the exact same way about LASIK specials.

And it’s not even the fun kind of different, like when Aerosmith & Run DMC got together a million years ago & said “You know what? Let’s totally mess with some people.”

The fact that their relationship hybrid name is a choice of Gwake, Blen, Stefelton or Shelfani portends only certain doom.

Still less white than that selfie.

Few things:

Continued reading: Mass murderer Richard Speck’s slaughter in 1966 of 8 student nurses in their dorm.

To be fair, I got an ex like that.