Did you hear about the time Bluto went to Mount Olive?

His finances sure are Messi! ..nyuk, nyuk.. chortle-snort

Oh fun! Is it on Netflix? (what movie is it?)

Very mollusk! ... Much shell!

I may or msy not have done this kind of thing a few times out the window of a moving car on highway 53 overlooking Arlington Park race track in my youth.. Maybe

This isn’t really a celeb-dick moment, it’s more like an awkward moment which was actually my fault. In late March 2012, I was working at the Chicago Blackhawks practice rink, driving the Zamboni and taking out the garbage (that’s all the job was, actually). During one of the Hawks practices, I stepped off the Zam…

Does getting your mother involved and having to endure the ridicule and scrutiny of the entire internet qualify as emotionally naked? I’ll bet she already passed the class.

How’s your father?

The reason people think most Hawks fans are “fair weather” is because people only started paying attention to the Hawks after old man Wirtz died and his successors stopped alienating the fanbase. His policies were so backwards and toxic it almost made more sense to boycott the team back in those days. (me, I enjoyed…

Actually, an Eric Daze jersey is the only jersey I own! (other than the boxful of crappy men’s league jerseys in the basement)

The good part about being a Hawks fan before old man Wirtz died was getting into the games for 8 bucks (with student ID) and immediately moving down to the 100 section to watch them lose. During that era, I never expected or hoped they’d accomplish anything, I just liked watching the rookies and prospects come…

I misread that as ‘Bacon’ which made me chuckle as I imagined his son being named ‘Bacon Jr.’.

Your words lol me.

Morals indeed.

even in your landlord’s driveway?

Agree.. except the part about the Sox losing, the Bulls and the Cubs existing at all...

Wow! Look at all those orbs floating! This must be the most haunted Holiday Inn hotel bar in the world! Maybe he's possessed? Maybe one of those supernatural buggers slipped into his soul and took over the controls? Who's the patron demon of throwing chairs?

Looks like I made a mistake when I stopped watching..

...hand banana?... I thought they looked like some sort of bizarre penis/airplane-with-broken-wings hybrid.. i guess.

Mike North is still a thing? I thought his boat sunk already.. ??