God bless Adam Schiff.

Or he’d shit the bed in the first round.

Strong bracket this year, but Tacko Fall deserved an at-large bid.

Every day for half a semester my roommate bombarded me with really lame, stupid puns. Every fucking day. Finally, in a chemistry class we had together, I told him to shut the fuck up.

So you’re feeling Sturm und Dang?

How long is Thor under contract? ‘Cuz it sounds like he’s going to burn rubber speeding away from Citi Field when he hits free agency

Stormy Daniels again showed how smart she is by dumping this guy right on time.

Dave, as a native of the DC area, I view this piece and others like it as local treasures.  Do keep up the good work.

You sound like Jim Tomsula dreaming he was a rich guy.

So I pulled up Ratt’s Round and Round official video and discovered that it features none other than Milton Berle. Milton Berle and Ratt... what a weird pairing.

It’s tough to compare athletes across generations, but Lou Brock or Nick Foles?

It’s a weak case. The tweets from Devin Nunes’ Cow seem pretty homogenized.

What is a “full-serve station”?

Part of the reason the Redskins are among the top valued teams is that - unlike many other franchises - Snyder owns the stadium in which they play. That asset bumps up the value, even though it’s a crappy stadium.

Watch the asshole snap his fingers at the manager afterwards, like an entitled prick.

The director of that telecast was remarkably able to avoid any camera shots showing what the hell was going on.  Kudos.

48 minutes ago:

When I order to-go at at a burger place and ask for ketchup for my fries, invariably I’m given approximately 65 packets of ketchup. 62 or 63 of those end up in the trash unused. So the answer has to be ketchup.

Take your goddam star.