Even though I've mostly gone ebook these days...

I would always fly first class.

I’m betting the employee took the time off without really telling anyone, just didn’t show up and then the email actually doesn’t seem so bad. “Where were you?” “I was at the birth of my son.” Why didn’t you tell anyone where you were, we had a client in and I had no idea what happened. It was embarrassing. Of…

Commentator MizJenkins over at Gawker said it perfectly: When God Himself came to Earth as a human he chose woman as the vessel. He did not consult with any man, including Mary’s husband Joseph, in any way.

the baddddddest bish

This so much. My votes for president really only amount to keeping the Supreme Court as liberal as possible.

“I meant to do that.”

Resting "I'm fabulous" face?

BRING BACK SAL.

“I hate it when women are experienced and mature enough to know I’m full of shit.”

"Iraq has weapons of mass destruction."

Right? Mix it with some Kill Bill stuff where Cinderella goes all batshit on the stepsisters and blasts her way out of the scullery. Then the Prince is all "I will save you" and she's all "NOT NECESSARY but come along if you can keep up."

A King always trumps a dropped deuce.

i watch Oscars for all the pretty dresses.

When you have to hijack someone else's tragedy to serve your agenda, you've failed.