NARCISSISM: The Beyoncé Documentary by Beyoncé

I was really hoping this was a reply to my Beyoncé comment. It applies!

I mean yeah, I guess to her face. She has a nice face. I would much prefer to bow down to an awesome face attached to an awesome brain that wants to use her power and influence for some good. But yeah, nice face.

I get more of a child of very involved parents vibe. Aren’t her parents therapists? I get a strong child of a therapist vibe. Like every inane thought she has ever had has been coddled and fostered and water birthed into existence.

Did we read the same article? I have clammy palms and I am cold but sweating. I need a xanax. I mean it’s positive and beautiful and all that. But Fucking hilarious? I don’t know. Also, I really want a baby (covers eyes and ears) blah blah blah I can’t hear you I can’t hear you ripped in 3 places I didn’t hear that.

Guess they were madelikeshit

Not a fan of using a middle name or initial on a daily basis.

This website should be called peengrabber.

One time some friends came over while I was making a quick Croque Monsieur for my boyfriend and I before we all went out. We were running late, I had the stove going a pot going a whole thing. They were like what are you making? “Sandwiches” I said. They looked at me like I was a lunatic.

This was in Arizona wasn't it? Fucking Arizona.

I see what you mean. Steve seems like the most normal fun boyfriend. I guess, as a young lady, I was more of a Steve in the streets and a Dylan in the sheets kinda girl ;)

Anyone remember The Heights? He was a cool musician dude on that too, but it was shamefully cancelled so they spun him off into Donna’s musician boyfriend. I used to have the how do you talk to an angel cassette single on my walkman. I was a big fan.

Brandon? Get real.

But where were they going to take that carrier? Like the article said in the bulkhead there's no where to put it. Was she going to be able to hold it? If that’s the case, she was just being difficult. But if they were going to take the carrier away to a “safe location” with her pet in it I completely understand her…

That’s sweet. Sometimes I cover the window side of their carriers so they can just see me and nothing else. I think this helps them fall asleep. But this last trip we had a shit in the carrier situation so one ended up on my lap for about 4 hours. Sometimes she would pop her head up and people could see I was a loose…

The animals are almost always fine. It’s us owners that are the problem. But I did take my two cats away with me last weekend for a road trip and the stress brought out a nasty herpes break out in both of them. My little sluts <3

This is very sad to me. As an obsessive pet owner, whenever possible I drive to my destination and bring my pets with me. If I ever had to fly with my pets I would find it incredibly stressful. I am also pretty much at all times, one bad interaction with someone away from a meltdown. Every day that a video like this…

Shouldn’t this be on Snatched - the new sub jez for women with vaginas interested in crime and kidnappings?

Getting weed at my local dispensary is such a classy affair.They are all hello! Welcome! Can I show you something in a sativa today? Good choice! Nice day, huh? How’s your mom doing, she was sick last week right? If they sold toothpaste and tampons I would never go to CVS again. If they offered teeth cleanings I’d…

The Slot? You know women, politics, vaginas. The Slot. You get it.