Toaster ovens are the unsung heroes of small kitchen appliances.

What made it weirder was I didn’t grow up around my dad. I had hugged him probably less than a dozen times in my life. And the pizza hands massage was just too much! 🍕🖐🏾🍕

Those were worth biting a sibling.

A real American hero. I don’t care if your face looks like it’s made of bologna slices. #cruzn’

My only experience with a massage was with my 65 yo dad who is just about to graduate massage therapy school this year. At family gatherings for the last two years he brings his massage table. Last summer my siblings and I ran a half marathon, so he thought it was a perfect opportunity to demonstrate his skills. We…

Yeah, I have only more questions at this point. That took some serious cash. Like, is some elaborate performance art thing-y?

Bc you're a baller or bc they saw you as a liability for health care costs?

One crafty thing I used to do was make coasters using tile squares, six pack cartons, and modge podge. So easy I could even do it!

Used to collect beer glasses and bottle caps, but now that there’s a craft brewery per every 2 Americans, I kind of quit.

Was that person you? Id be horrified and impressed at the same time.

As a cereal lover, I could be into this. It makes me miss the little license plates that would come in the boxes of Honeycombs back in the day.

I love how she throws in that she “love teenage dream tho.” I mean, it is a mega jam even if you're a h8tr.

She's almost gone full on Kanye.

Hell yeah, can't go wrong with Sauvignon Blanc!

As long as it's not Chardonnay, you're fine. Jk, jk, ok only a little.

You forgot that the perp also gets their hand chopped off. C’mon, how could you of all people forget that part of the punishment.

Knope, Knope, Knope!!!!! C’mon!

Charles and Charles red blend. 💥🍷💥

True. One of the most politically powerful dudes today once thought it was a good idea to sexually harass a woman by putting a pube on his Coke. Scary.

I'm afraid to hit that Biden link............