That's pretty bad when even kinja says no to the string dance! 😜

Dear Rich Homie Quan,

That was almost as funny as the wine glass getting bigger on the Friday Night lights skit

Not my finest moment on kinja. This I will admit.

Lolzzzzz! I thought of Conan And that weird cutting the strings to his hip thing he does.

Dude, it doesn’t matter. I’m not anatomically gifted per se, but for the most part I’m still pretty much a sexxx ninja.

Good call! I think it's my fave accessible American hefe.

The IPA’s that really make me scratch my head are the ones that taste like onion. Like how do people enjoy liquid that tastes like onions?!?!?!?!

I bet he has one of those cool leather accented aprons.

This is Hobby Lobby fan fiction, right?

Holy crap! I did not know that!!!!! I always thought Freedom was lamenting that he wasn’t born Jeff Tweedy. Whoa, mind blown.

Also this guy

I can't stop laugh-cringing at this.

I also remember Jeff Goldblum as Jurrasic Park Dr Ian Malcom being my mental image of the rocker guy.

Aw geez. All the cringe inducing moments are coming back!

There were parts I liked about the book. But there were parts that just made me want to throat punch Franzen. I just came away with the thought that he had such a disdain for his characters, especially Patty.

Hahahahahahaha! Aw man, that slayed me.

I feel like Freedom was Franzen’s way of dealing with never being a dad rocker. I think worse than the sex writing were the passages about music or relating to music.

I didn't think about that! He's one of the lizard people.