As someone who doesn’t drunk it is perfectly embarrassing now.

Sean Spicer,

“Only if the cats do not have any anti-capitalist leanings, Dave”

Representin’ M&Ms, motherfucker!

In Kyle’s defense, it’s not like he doesn’t back it up with his personality.

Hey Trump, shouldn’t you be golfing?

Phew, thought you were one of those “NOBODY COMPETES ANYMORE AND THE GAME’S GOTTEN SOFT, CHARLES OAKLEY WOULD’VE SUPLEXED LEBRON IF HE’D TRIED THAT BACK IN THE DAY” people after reading that first line

I thought Al Kaline water was mostly bourbon.

Housing, weapons, eh. It all looks the same floating gently back down to earth as radioactive fallout.

What is “Because they’re fucking evil” Alex.

Those idiots on Obamacare are sure going to be screwed when this goes through.

On a lighter note, tomorrow is the one week anniversary of the reading from the TelePrompTer speech that suddenly made Trump “Presidential”

“This is truly a terribly unfortunate loss.”

Apparently the Buss family hasn’t learned the lessons of the Treaty of Verdun.

I know nothing about the Buss family, but after reading the first three kids’ names, I began scrolling to make a joke about the fates of the other “J” named family members.... Only to realize the parents beat me by about four decades.

That’s the impressively low bar we’ve now set for the most powerful office in the world: allegedly literate.

Tangentially related, Tom Price’s seat in Georgia’s 6th district is up for grabs and I’m doing my best to help Jon Ossoff win. He has the endorsement of living legend John Lewis, and actually has a chance to flip the district.

I’ve said it before and I will say it again. The stock market rise is tied to the confidence people have that Trump will completely unleash businesses to do whatever they want. He is going to deregulate and let “the market” decide. Those irritating laws around financial instruments - gone! Environment issues -…