On my best day, I could angle that shot. But puttingg a stroke on it....wow.

Sooo

Never appeared in a playoff game.

Of course the Republicans will throw a bone to the middle class.

I have 3 free tickets on United because I took their credit card when I bought tickets to Hawaii for me and my kids last year, then bought some stuff with it. I’m trying to figure out how to use them on another airline.

Da fuck u live? Portland? Seattle is fucking lower Alaska.

You know the best part? Everyone is brainwashed. You. Me. Arnold Ziffel.

It was great how he invaded Grenada to take the 241 dead Marines out of the news, amirite?

I miss having a great President.

He once entered a woman’s bathroom by mistake. Still has the nightmares including the “ Jimmy legs”

Hackman: “TIME OUT”(team comes over to bench)

When all you have is a hammer, nails are the only thing you write about.

If this is a “free market” system, full of freedom, why am I forced to pay $2 a month for a racist, sexist, fascist FOXNEWS?

IDK, if Iran attacked a Carrier they should have a better plan than “not to lose”

I truly believe Alec Baldwin stuck the dagger in the heart of the O’Reilly show with that imitation

it’s those two a cappella singers Fred Armison and Kristen Wiig is on weekend update

NOW I need a bodyguard

One thing I have learned in my 54 revolutions around the sun that has served me well:

Just like, 20% of Americans?

You are a much better writer than I. Could you please re-write this to include how “Congo on the quad” was his utterance as his glistening seed made uts arrival upon her lower back in their college apartment, all those years ago? But now, it makes her ears burn in......ahhh forget it.