Rough estimate- maybe $100. Covers a couple dances, a few drinks, tipping dollars here and here or throwing $5 or $10 to a stripper if she sits and talks with you for a bit and you enjoy her company but don't want a lapdance. Gives you some breathing room to enjoy the night in a variety of ways and you won't feel…

Did NOT know that was a side effect of epidurals. Dang. Now I have to rethink my wish list of labor medications, maybe move some things around. Almost wish they could let people try these things out before labor so they have an idea what to expect from the drugs.

Sigh.

Can't doctors just figure out a way to sneak a…

Also his face was better in those pics.

It's like a reverse Pangaea where everything is moving 1mm closer per year.

Sorry Joe.

My half blind roommate said "Dana Carvey" with some conviction.

I say it is Sonic's saucy grandma.

Noooooo just realized I said this recently to a little girl who told me her name was Ella. "Oh like the princess in Frozen?"

She enthusiastically said "YES!" instead of correcting me so I blame her.

Really thought it was Ella. Never seen the movie and was trying to be cool :(

People with French or Spanish accents actually make that word sound pretty, it's not the worst name.

The worst is the German version, Nü-tella. So 90s.

Yes! It looked like my dentist's face was melting off. It was terrifying but still made me laugh uncontrollably. And I kept hearing music and echoes that weren't there.

My strongest memory is that the gas was bubble gum scented but now I'm wondering if that smell was real or not.

That 11 year old dog has a puppy face. I think she's had work done.

This post = best post

I've been having sex with lab mice for years and have yet to get pregnant.

Thanks, BPA!

What about a defense of "I didn't even look in the bag when they handed it to me, just put it on the floor of my car and drove home. Started feeling ill and wasn't hungry anymore by the time I got back, left the bag in the car for a few hours while I went inside to lie down, figured it was dangerous to eat food that…

I know. Would probably still end with a beating and jail time.

Jehovah sees all (unless you paid in cash).

Didn't this also happen last year at a McDonald's?

Related: a couple years ago I ordered 2 double cheeseburgers at a BK and they accidentally put 3 in the bag. I didn't return the burger. Whenever I see cops I have to hide my face from them because they're probably looking for me and that burger.

Do you insert them before or after sex?

omg I googled and saved this EXACT picture, almost put it in my last comment! Too funny.

Truly, these were the only sandals.

Was it like the one in this gif (from Wish Upon a Star circa 1996, featuring Katherine Heigl)? The 90s were such an attractive time.

Scrolling down and seeing Exhibit B was such a treat. Knew it was going to be bad from your story but oh my god that photo.

Cannot stop laughing.

I'm going to reserve judgment until you tell us which kind of sandals you were wearing. How high was the platform? This is important.

Her face at 5 seconds when she says "WROOOONG"... how can I teach my face to do that? Her mouth is hypnotic.