No, it’s because he has great temperament.

So if you complete a marathon at 8:30 mile pace, you jogged a marathon? Because that sounds stupid.

Let’s be clear though: They are both liars. One of them lies much more than the other, however.

Fact: This whole fucking Presidential election has been a nightmare that seems like it’s never going to end.

And then this city rejoices into Caps season, which always ends with a resounding... what’s the sound? Thud?

As a life-long DC fan, I’m just looking forward to the Nats losing the DS in 4 games.

Okay, but do you feel the same way about England, which voted for Brexit? Just curious, because it’s essentially the same thing. Boris Johnson is really just Oxbridge Trump.

I can. Caddyshack is obviously the answer.

You make a fair point.

. . . a breath mint for the anus.

I’ll put money down that Spurrier was forced out of Washington after Snyder found out that he let Dave drink some Gatorade for free.

People living in DC proper—a legitimately fantastic city—give half a shit about the Skins, because they know they’re strictly the domain of drunken racist suburbanites, rednecks dumb enough to plunk down hundreds of dollars every week to get trapped inside that roach motel of a stadium..

I agree. It’s in the Constitution under the “leg room” clause.

Only a fool fucks with Phelps when he’s in compete mode.

And fuck all this nonsense about him partying when he’s not swimming. That man has spent more time honing himself into the perfect swimmer than any of us have spent doing anything (including jerking off). He ought to have a life permit to party the fuck down…

Well, that about wraps up the case, then! Good work, detective!

Honestly, this conversation has me convinced I’d watch a reality show based on the premise.

Sometimes I like to get rid of my pennies when i’m buying my calzone

He would have Reservations.

I told my (now) wife something early when we started shacking up: You can tell me what to do, or how to do it. But not both.

The little league dugout was good enough for Stacy, freshman at Ridgemont High, to lose her virginity.