Bartolo Colon one-upped him with a foursome. A true baller goes for four patties on his Shake Shack burger

— Stay on the active roster for an entire MLB season

How is it 2016 and we still can’t do live sports interviews without there being like a three second delay between the connections?

This is a terrible joke.

I’m going to an Indian wedding with my girlfriend in April and I already told her if there isn’t an elephant I’m leaving.

Actually The Police are quite good, thank you.

Agreed. I had a free ticket to a Police show and almost didn’t go because I might know 3 or 4 Police songs. Nope. Not only did I know every song in the set I could have sung every lyric (I didn’t. Never do that. Nobody’s here to hear you sing.), and I liked the show. The Police are a damn fine band.

Are you ever going to run out of lawns to tell people to get off of?

You hate everything.

This article is funny. There are some good jokes in it. Jokes about Sting.

at least they didn’t get fucking Drake.

I have to disagree. I believe The Police are good.

Since when do lips have personalities?

Thank you for being the sole Internet commenter brave enough to stand up for the police in 2016.

Hey! The Police are actually good! I don’t care for Sting’s solo stuff, but c’mon! The Police are good.

Oh fuck off. Sting’s one of the best storyteller/songwriters there is.

How about one of my local sports radio hosts Jim Traber...he went back for seconds!

I was hoping this would make it to Rod Allen’s level.