My sister bought a pet lizard after day drinking.

My god that trophy is hilarious. I’m stealing that idea and going to hand those out like participation awards.

I hope it doesn’t become recurring, but this dream happened just last night. It was as vivid as the lucid dreams I have but I never went lucid. I was in my old car, about to turn out of my old subdivision, when a semi swerved and the trailer swung out and clipped the side of my car. I felt the impact and everything…

They’re there to play footbaw, not play school.

What does it say about Adam Dunn that my first guess is always him, even though I’m pretty sure he has been featured before?

I have a relative who is a pilot for the Colts. He flew in Edgerrin James and his family when he got put in the illustrious “Ring of Honor.” After about 4 hours in the shit hole called Indianapolis he flew Edge’s family back home. They couldn’t take it, they skipped the ceremony because being in Indy sucks so much.

Castro could have been on the bench and no one would argue an error charged to him.

Knucklehead.

Amazing toss by Murphy. No look, on the money. Fantastic.

I’d love to see her sources on those statistics. Basically I just want to see her ass because that’s where she pulled them from.

You’re married to your mother?

The cowardly pitcher uses deception to try to fool the strong slugger. A vile being. He cries in fear as the honorable masher hits a devastating home run.

That’s what I want in a relationship. I’m envious.

The kind that’s after a nice dinner and a bottle of wine, that then moves to the bedroom.

The kind that’s after a nice dinner and a bottle of wine, that then moves to the bedroom.

Reggie nooooooo

Oh I thought the joke was the belief that his stupidity was part of some predestined plan for the better from a higher power.

That was one of the most bullshit calls I’ve ever seen. Sorry about the last two days, as well.

I drank my Dogfish Head 90 Minute Imperial IPA thinking if I kept my Coors Light pace I’d be double drunk. I went waaaaaaay past double drunk. Now I know why.

Fffffffzzzrvsafeeeewvhhdn###//

“Did they pick them up?”