Obviously they were put up to this by George Soros.

while carrying a log, and being followed by former KGB officers in an unmarked black sedan!

“Alexa, what would Cillian Murphy look like if he had Ben Affleck’s haircut?”

Face Off II: Electric Derpy Drew?

Basically the entire Russia training montage from Rocky IV should be an Olympic sport. Hell, the Russians are already keeping up their end of the bargain with the Drago parts.

man he’s like RIGHT on the brink of a Jimmy The Greek moment. I can FEEL it.

Dad?

the worst televised performance by a Brit since the first episode of Black Mirror.

dammit

*trademarks “tantric skating”*

How many points are awarded for cunnilingus?

“Lamar Jackson is just too short to play QB in the NFL. He can’t even outplay his brother Willis, and he’s always getting pushed around by The Gooch.”

zee neep sleep

For your Oscar consideration:

BIll later had a Corona and opined about the humidity being what “really gets you.”

this is really going to kill my “Everybody Pyeongchang tonight”remix.

Spot on. All of the shit that surrounds football is fun (fantasy, betting lines, uniforms, tailgating, helmets, etc.) but the actual games these days kind of suck.

Wait, I thought Ultron already destroyed Slovenia?

Of course his friends will say nice things about him. Otherwise he’ll Rippon them.

Henry Kissinger was a bold choice.