Christie tried going to a public beach, but the people from Green Peace kept trying to roll him into the ocean.

It’s poker, not Quizzo.

I look forward to watching the Netflix series about this in 2037. Dan will obviously be played by a then grizzled, post-rehab Chris Pratt.

It’s much better than his original finishing move he called the “gay panic”

This will further prove the point that Chris Christie even SOUNDS fat.

A Trump-supporting Red Sox fan?

I always enjoy going to the happy bar from 4-5 PM on Fridays for gay hour.

Dad?

I just look forward to the wacky Farrelly Brothers movie about this where he’s played by Ed Asner

That was sort of my point in using Vegas as an example though as opposed to an established club with stars. They’re a unique situation. They have a filthy amount of draft pick compensation after the expansion draft, and they have no incumbent stars on the team to mess anything up internally if they did somehow land…

Pronger

If you’re a team like Vegas, a division rival and who will have a shit ton of cap to burn after this year, what’s to stop your from offer-sheeting Draisatl some stupid contract like say $10 million per for 8 years? Either you get a potential superstar to be your franchise’s cornerstone (tax free!) or you handcuff your…

Utah: Imagine Buffalo...now take away most of the alcohol.

I’m waiting by the phone. Waiting for you to call me up and tell me I’m not fucking old.....

Yoda’s seen some shit, man.

Never tell me the odds!

You need to have “I won’t tell your mother about this.” embroidered into the back seat.

Always a good move when you can simultaneously lower both your team ERA and BMI by roughly 20% in the same transaction.

This now confirms my long-running suspicion that you are, in fact, Nicholas Sparks.

You down with JPP?