“Illegal stitch in time on the receiving team. Nine yard penalty. Replay the down.”

All NFL teams with eventually be located in either megacities or corrupr red states where you can watch the footbaw but infant mortality is at like 40%.

They don’t call it the ‘House of Reps” for nothing, bro!

they’ll just have to make their way out to into the desert I guess...

I’ll take my steak medium-rare with a heaping side of JUSTICE!

Won’t someone think of the Lot Lizards!!!

National Puppy Day was bullshit, right?

Some say he lacks the capacity, others say his plan just needs some updating.

I imagine that Harbaugh is the kind of guy who has a wallet the size of In Search of Lost Time that he has to cram into those things

ANNEX DAT ASS!!!

would you really want a blowjob from a lot lizard WITH teeth?

The Pork Barrel Express

“Amateurs.”

Davis: http://m.mlb.com/news/article/94335720/orioles-chris-davis-suspended-25-games-for-amphetamines/

I’m gonna guess on a party of 23 (!) the tip is included on the bill, hence it being typed and not handwritten.

Wah-labama! Saban Loses it Over Control Question

Seems legit.

We try to get gritty players that work hard every day and give their best effort every day. Our fans seem to like that and respond to it.

Remember, no more than two pumps!

Gotta love Mark Davis’ commitment to the whole “supervillain” look with the all white ensemble. It’s like if you merged Lloyd Christmas and The Kingpin into one terrifying amalgam of public extortion.