I don’t really take issue with the word “action.” I take issue with the Dad providing the imagery of the guy going to town on an incapacitated woman for 20 minutes, and expecting that to elicit sympathy for him.

I don’t see Bumgarner’s name, so this can’t be accurate.

The whole issue is that he is not going to prison. He’s going to county for 3-6 months, and he’ll have protection there since he’s now the most famous rapist this side of Bill Cosby.

Boys will be boys!

It’s really an unimpeachable defense:

Maybe?

I can’t get over his Dad’s “20 minutes” quote. Mostly because 20 minutes is a real long time to fuck a motionless body. Maybe he meant 20 seconds? Even if you are drunk, at some point you have to feel a little creeped out by your actions, right?

It’s pretty obvious that hot dogs are sandwiches- otherwise a sausage sandwich isn’t a sandwich, even though it’s basically the same thing.

Yup. Even the things they are literally calling bugs: Ladybird Beetle, Woodlouse, etc., very much not bugs.

There are only a couple of things that are technically bugs-stinkbugs, bed bugs. I might have missed another one.

Poor fucking Cleveland. They steamroll through the Eastern conference while jacking up threes...

Considering that 60% of the world lives in Asia, there’s a chance that the most popular person in the world is someone you’ve never heard of.

Anyone who is popular in China has an enormous leg up on everyone else.

Seems like 20 minutes is a long time to have sex with a limp body.

These stories are great and all, but I happened to know the Cardinals lost last night. Where’s that story? They play again in a couple hours, and I don’t want to see some two-for-one recap.

Try doing that in the playoffs when all the pressure’s on, though.

One time my wife got these large round sprinkles- edible BB’s basically. They spilled out of the container, and we find them in crevices around the room months and months later. Nothing tastes good enough for that, and sprinkles don’t taste nearly good enough. I threw the rest away.

It’s a trick!

“And sure, maybe you’d prefer just vanilla or just chocolate and there’s a case to be made choosing for the chocolate shell instead of sprinkles.”