I discovered UPS is pretty dope for a minimum wage job, and now thanks to the Teamsters, starting wage is even higher. Only part time, but you get FREE healthcare (no premiums) after nine months on the job and $25K in tuition reimbursement as soon as you start. Lots of pay increases built into the CBA, too, and I’m…

If the 50-year-old insists on seeing some skin before he gets hitched, his boys should take him to a burlesque show. Chill atmosphere minus some hooting and hollering, and they’re actually entertaining vs. depressing. And there are tons of themed shows, too. Took my best friend to a Star Wars show with Chewbacca…

Yeah, that ump was full of it. Glad Javy is on my team.

Take it from a new homeowner: love your responsive landlord while you have one. My oven has the same problem, but since it was me doing the stupid thing of using the self-cleaning function, I’m on the hook for the fix. And since we’re looking to replace the thing anyway, we’re now ovenless until we save up for the new…

The other idiotic reason behind the arbitrary rules for World Series HFA (alternating years and ASG winner) was logistics. MLB claimed media and teams had to get their travel schedules ready, and the only way to know that was guaranteeing which team would have which games.

That’s a relic from the days of traveling by…

The “dads are awkward and anti-social” narrative you keep pushing is really tiresome.

It was just the fact they kept running with James. It’s the fact they kept running the same exact play with James, which let the D stand him up so those eight guys upfront could keep punching at the ball.

That and my wife and I would like another child, so I’m shagging balls and protecting balls in the OF from here on out.

Same goes for subbing for an all-dude softball team in a new town: unless you can prove you were blocked at triple-AAA by Derek Jeter, you will play RF and you will bat 10th.

Same here re: not growing up with hockey. Bill Wurtz buried the Blackhawks for my generation by only broadcasting road games on some cable channel. Idiot didn’t recognize how the Cubs grew into a national treasure by flooding the market with their FREE broadcasts despite being awful for most of their time on the WGN…

I wish somebody had yelled at Lackey for not running to cover first on the grounder hit at Rizzo on the ensuing play. Rizzo has enough to deal with when Lester’s pitching.

And they can pull in the Annies, too! A pal and I were waiting out a rain delay in the Cell’s bleachers. We entertained ourselves by watching a couple of Detroit’s “finest” jersey-chasers throw themselves at the Tigers’ bullpen catcher. While I was shouting my praise/admiration for such an accomplishment with nary a…

When a team gets an out like this, there should be a rule forcing them to throw the glove/ball mutation around the horn.

Lester looks like he’s tossing his glove to the guy on the opposing softball team who left his at the office by mistake.

If you weren’t pro writers, what be your preferred career? I’ve just been notified there will be 10 percent pay cuts across the board at trade publisher. Beats getting laid off, I know, but I’m tired of waiting for the inevitable to happen to the print industry.

I pulled off something similar. Playing CF in fall ball during high school, some dude crushed it over my head toward the chain link fence. I knew I’d be lucky to keep him to a triple, so I ran straight for the fence and kicked up some dirt on the track as I nudged the ball through the opening between the fence and…

The name brand/generic debate is losing its relevance for us Aldi shoppers if my crippling Goldfish addiction is any indication.

Is it possible to posthumously enshrine the Deadspin Hall of Fame into the Deadspin Hall of Fame if the Deadspin Hall of Fame already appears to be dead?

Ugh, the Dancing Itos. Sealed my fate as a Letterman man for life.

Yet the radio guy who had Sue Bird do something similar was suspended and/or fired.