If I were a cop, I’d probably use the push-bars much too frequently.

A McMuffin with nuffin'.

Just curious as I was thinking about this this morning, what do you guys call these?

Damn. That’s nearly 1,000 GBP. That’s over $1,500 USD. I’m all for getting people in the right lane but overly harsh fines are not something I’m in favor of.

I know. Whenever I have a 6-pack, I drink it.

I have no idea why there would be any amount of hand-wringing on this. 28% of South Carolina is black and the flag, loveliness of individuals aside, is an official statement telling them they ain’t shit and, as the birthplace of secessionist thought, we yearn for a time where we could, if we wish, decide to own you.

Especially 20 miles east. Fuckin sharks, man.

Sheriff Buford T. Justice might just disagree, you sum bitch.

Dude are you kidding? Every single episode of The Bob Newhart Show began with Bob and his cousin diving through the open doors of an Olds 88, shooting a bow and arrow out the window, peeling out and jumping the car over an abandoned bridge.

You’re an idiot, but I would kill to see LeBron fuck some people up on a tennis court.

Reports out of Alouettes training camp say that Michael Sam was having a hard time adjusting to his role in the 12-man CFL defensive scheme, where teams generally employ a fifth defensive back.

Wow, looks like Eggshell with Romalian type. Patrick Bateman would be proud.

The problem is not that she’s a white person leading an NAACP chapter. The problem is that she’s a white person who seemingly lied about being black and then headed an NAACP chapter.

Why thank you. And remember, if you’re in a street fight, go for the ears. They tear easily, and gush lots of blood (albeit nothing life threatening). The pain and spraying vino scares the hell out of your opponent enough to panic and distract them from fighting and gives you the advantage.

This sounds like one of those things where you go “ZOMG THAT SOUNDS SO FUNNY AND AWESOME” and then you turn it on and 5 minutes in you go “oh, wait, this is like a whole thing” and you realize the only funny part is its actual existence.

Breaking a car window isn’t as easy as most people believe it to be.

If your door release design requires a secondary mechanical emergency release...just make the fucking primary release mechanical. Opening a door shouldn’t require an instruction manual. RIP, Mr. Rogers and Leia.

Hey I’m not complaining. If she asked me to motorboat them, I totally would.

The fucking craziest thing I learned about serving on a carrier, was how close it was to my time in juvie and in prison.