My cousin was/is a low level musician, and he sued The Purple One for allegedly stealing some of his music. He lost, of course, and since he’s generally a whiny man-baby no one in the family could ever really decide whether or not to believe him.

I mentioned in an earlier post that he wanted “Vanity” to call herself “Vagina”. I suspect the stories are worse?

Cmon, Cubs fans. We all want Jim Deshaies out of the TV booth, but there are better ways.

That is an attractive kitchen setup.

That prancing ninnyhammer is about as bright as a black hole and twice as dense.

I haven’t been to sleep yet. Can’t wake up hungover if you don’t sleep, right? #teamwayoldenoughtoknowbetter.

You know when someone starts talking about how they have a high IQ and it has been tested, they’re going to say something really stupid after.

I thought those halos were made with 100% Cambodian tofu, and formed by the hands of 8 year olds, forced to mousterize every hour since birth?

It makes me think of the crease under my boobs. In the summer they are like two extra armpits.

Gwyneth: it’s called a halo. You have one, right? Didn’t you curate a collection of platinum and jewel encrusted haloes to match the ibis feather wings and the uranium harp in your “I’m No Angel, I’m What Angels Admire” sales campaign?

A close relative of mine was one of the responders who removed her body from the tank. I still get shivers thinking about her death, and the impact of removing soemone’s corpse from a water tower.

Does that explain why everything after Season 5 of Supernatural has been ass? Were they getting their revenge?

What I love is when someone replies to a comment I made 2 years ago, on a subject I’ve significantly changed my opinion on. Of course my first reaction is to defend my old opinion, because I’m stubborn like that.

My dog, Princess Trudy, died this afternoon. I’m overwhelmed with emotion, but amazed at the love outpouring from family and friends. She was 16 1/2, and had a great life.

every time i see a kinja notification, i sigh and say, “what stupid shit did i say this time?”

When I worked at Red Lobster we had this torture device/kitchen gadget that cut the lemons for tea and water. We had to wear a chain maille glove when we used it. I scoffed at the ridiculousness and then got three stitches in my finger.

As someone whose SO used to work in restaurants/friends still do and a regular reader of BCO, I believe this story 110%

I am not a fan of Rosie O’Donnell, but her response to this on Twitter was the best possible thing she could have said: “try explaining that 2 ur kids”

True! (Colbert was always a huge talent though, Strangers with Candy?)