Is “playing the woman card” just basically saying anything at all while having a vagina?

I’ve been wearing Moschino’s Couture! for like a decade. I don’t wear it on garbage days (like, I’ll just wear something from anthropologie or find a cheap body spray if all I have to do is run errands) but it makes its way in about 3-4 days a week.

MY BABY TAKES THE MORNING TRAIN plays on loop

I’m the same age as Taylor, down to near the same day of the year, and I can’t fucking imagine going to someone’s 20th birthday if it wasn’t for immediate family.

How do people keep missing the joke? Her entire comedy persona, and I mean ENTIRE, is built upon being desperate for fame. Like, her “thirst” and then ultimate failure is literally the joke.

I hope you recover soon. It must be terrible to be sick during the holidays and to be away from work for so long!

So a few days after Kendall’s lesbian rumor is reignited she’s seen CANOODLING with Harry GOOD TIMING GIRL.

I constantly follow/unfollow him because I can’t stand to read it but also is Allen alive I need to check.

We still have Maddie? :(

You were hands down the easiest Jezebel writer to warm up to in years. I’ve missed you, and I hope you and Allen (‘poor Allen’ is my fav Jez meme ever) have the best life together ever.

Just imagine all of the dogs howling and scratching their ears. Canine equivalent of dragging a performer off the stage with a cane looped around their waist.

Are frequencies only dogs can hear mostly upsetting to them, like my dog’s bark-egg? Or are there pleasant frequencies unknown to human happiness?

I’m sorry for laughing. It’s like what a middle school student would think would be SUPER OFFENSIVE to Muslims and it’s seriously so juvenile and I feel like a kid for laughing at it. I’m happy the dude was like “Actually this is p comical.”

As far as the midwest goes it’s like confusing NYC and idk fucking Provincetown. It’s like confusing Miami for Mobile. Confusing Vegas for Albuquerque.

I straight up didn’t know that about Stephanie and Bobby’s divorce. Man, I hope it was her. I love the shit out of her. One time some strangerbitch Stephanie stan intercepted a tweet I made at fightingpolish about Stephanie and Bobby’s divorce, and he DM’d me “untag me please untag me” so I untagged him and got…

what if u woke up one morning and u thought cleveland was chicago

Homegirl is super pretty and she comes off as a sweetheart on Twitter. It blows my mind when little worms like this guy some how fuck up relationships that seem... Improbably in their favor.

Maybe he worked for some low-rent digestive specialist? Maybe he worked for a nearby porn studio?!!!

WHAT 😱😱😱😱

That is so, so perfect how much time have you spent developing that analogy. I love Kiki.