He would start. Boogie’s outlook is bleak - Elton Brand is best case scenario for a big man Achilles comeback. And Cousins doesn’t stretch the floor like Love, thus why I would have enjoyed seeing Love play with the Dubs. Can’t believe this generated so much attention when I was trying to make a joke about Love being…

Well captain fucknuts, for starters he would be a 16-12 machine and would be viewed much more favorably compared to his time with LeBron. His narrative could change from 5x all-star to fringe HOF. He could help take the next evolution of death squad. He could dip his nutsack on your nose. FOH.

I really would have liked to see Love join the Dubs. May have completely changed the narrative for his career. Now he just gets to set the Cuyahoga River on fire 22-28 times a year

Barbaro would have beat Wallace like a rented mule

Correct - but again, GMG staff should be able to reverse engineer the account that brought the troll out, then ban both accounts. It’s electronic forensics 101. Now back to our regularly sheduled shitposts...

Serious question: who started following that troll to bring them out of the greys? Was there a name change along the way? Who else is that user associated with? Should be easy for the editorial team to clean up some garbage.

Wow and I always thought Planet Fitness was the gym that was soft as baby shit

You need to reconceptualize your dietary intake times

I had to google it to verify, but HOLY SHIT Oliver Perez is still playing! He seems like he should be about 50 years old by now!

Christkindle isn’t cold. Hard to be cold when you are smushed together with 10,000 of your closest suburban friends and you literally shuffle your feet rather than walk, but hey at least you pay 8 bucks for a cup of shitty microwaved wine ok you know what fuck Chicago I hate this city and it’s 137 days of January

AJ Daulerio paid for a .jpg but then he got greedy paying for a .mpg and look where we are now

As Nick Denton titled the final Gawker post, this is “How Things Work”

Bidwill also knows they ain’t making the playoffs! You realize he meant 4 preseason games + 16 regular season games, right?

My dad bod agrees that there is nothing better than a cold meatloaf sandwich the next day. Well, maybe served with a side of cold pizza...

The problem with Melo is he was only ever able to elevate his game a couple times a year - Olympics Melo WAS peak Melo and his talent was never more than Hall of Good enough to sustain an elite level of winning basketball.

We don’t write in Sheed until the sequel “Kicking The Balls 2: Ball Don’t Lie”

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Take your goddamn +1 and get out of here dad

I’ll root like hell to watch Lebron and Draymond shut him down during his 9 mins per game off the bench in the playoffs before he gets DNP-CD’d