He’s totally signing with the Cardinals and is taking them to the playoffs. Goddammit.

Oh I get it, though not to your extent. I’m 6'4 and 220, very broad (but not like your husband because I can finally be the loltinydude checking in at 44L). I just hate being lumped in with people who don’t work out and don’t care that they make the rest of us pay for an extra seat versus people that do work hard but…

“If I catch you talking shit about D Rose, I’m gonna beat your ass.”

Melo is has always been overrated SHIT.

But is he a 56XL because he works out or because he does not work out? My sympathy depends on that very key factor.

Aqib Talib does his best to keep fine jewelry off the field

Judging by his whiny bitch ass voice, that man’s testicles have yet to descend

Playoff LeBron will humble Ben Simmons if they meet, GSW is not afraid (but leery), and no Dantoni team will ever win the finals because he’s too busy watching his teams find new ways to shit the bed even when they are the consensus best team in the league

To be fair, the list of people not afraid of LeBron in the playoffs is pretty short:
KG, Paul Pierce, Kobe, Dirk, Timmy, Manu, Tony Parker, Steph, KD, Thompson, did I forget anyone?

...Oh yeah, he lost to Dwight Howard and Hedo Terkoglu once. Nevermind let’s move on.

Too bad he didn’t ask the homeless guy what his thoughts were

The real joke is always in the replies

I was a college bartender and to be honest I don’t think I even knew how to make a cocktail with more than two ingredients until my real-world girlfriend ordered vodka-water-limes and broke my Natty Light mind

Tarik Cohen*

I’m not buying anymore of your books or using the Chopped .gif again until you take back your Chainsaw Sword smack talk

That escalated quickly Whitney

Former bartender that can confirm many basic bitches love Long Islands at their favorite campus bar

Scrappy save at the end of that last sentence. Lots of heart and left it all out on the field(box).

You had me at cocaine and maple syrup

Shortest Dennis Miller joke I’ve ever heard

This is why I avoid r/Westworld.