'Baters gonna 'bate.

Spain? Spain.

All the stars

You gotta brine a pork chop, otherwise, forget it.

"Don't feel bad honey. Hey, cheer up, lemme do an impression of you in the finals!

"The Circle" needs to become mandatory reading for this generation immediately.

This is just perfect

As a white male who was born and raised in NH and has spent the past 10 years living in NYC, it is indeed quite fascinating. I shouldn't dismiss them like that, but my god they're not doing themselves many favors with their attitudes towards others.

Hockey Fans: The Tea Party of sports fandom

"Short shorts? C'mon bro."

More like "In da chub", AMIRITE??!!!

"When it reigns, it bores."

It's cool, I'll say it. She's not that funny.

"If possible, try to acquire the following: Blocking/tackling dummies"

This is equal parts laughable/sad. Somewhere Jimmy Page just farted and it sounded better than this.

I guess I'll just trash my "Cancer for Cure" El-P record then, even though it's thoughtful and brilliantly produced. Got it.

I'm a commie liberal New England Obama gay marriage care hippie, but putting those insanely arrogant and hypocritical Johnathan Safran Foer quotes on their drink cups makes me want to shoot something.

This comment needs way more stars.

It's ironic because most of the boys finish in under 4.5 seconds.

"When drunk we are all 'Melo." Depends. A few tequilas and I'm channeling Steven Adler circa 1985.