Tight End: "I get a.....gimp mask, coach? Why? New drill?"

The best part was Pujols sliding AFTER Pearce caught the ball, as if he was trying to make it look like a close play.

Beautiful updating of the "Bugs saws off Florida" gif.

Well, yes, but when Flood arrives "in style", it'll help draw elite talent to the school, which will thus win more, and make everybody's lives just a bit more sparkly and wonderful! Especially the vast majority of residents who couldn't possibly give less of a fuck about how well the school does! So, in the end,…

Rob Deer begat Mark Reynolds, who begat Chris Carter

"nothing special" when it comes to licks? You sound like my ex-wife. HEY-OH!

"Is he some kind of athletic freak who stands at 6-foot-6, has a 40-inch vertical, and can run a 60-yard dash in 6.6 seconds?"

"Dammit. There ain't a fuckin' thing I can believe in no more. Here I thought I'z a member of a real community, not some buncha damn eee-leet commie lawyer types!"—KlansmanDan69, Redskinsfacts.com member

He approaches baseball like sweatshop employees approach the next shift.

The man is living, breathing history, and when he dies, the game will never be the same.

"I'll drink to that!"—Eddie Sutton's ghost

Jesus, Gordon! The solution is simple—just meet with Raj, say you're 'weelie weelie sowwee', and bam! 16, cut down to 3! Sorry, but 3 is the lowest you'll get. After all, smokin' the chron is bad. I mean, 'worse than spousal abuse' bad.

Expecting Disney to put together a factual sports movie constructed completely by the actual story would be like expecting actual reality from a reality show. The entire Disney brand is built on that stupid 'when you wish upon a star' crap!

Come on, Dawkins! Don't overthink this as a way to have it fit into certain categories that applies a certain 'degree' to the issue, in some vain effort to appear like some sort of 'deep thinker'. Think of it this way—being forced against your will, through ANY means, to engage in ANY sexual activity that you do not…

"Needs more combover"—Donald Trump

Because that's what we need, is a way to make self-absorption easier and more efficient.

(sighs) I guess it'll have to do.....

Nobody applauded in 1971, when a little known 6th round draft pick sauntered into the offices at The Washington Post, determined to make history. But sure enough, in his second year, when the starter went down, young Bob Woodward stepped in, and never let go of the reins.

And after Bell saw Monroe's scouting report, he determined right then and there that he WOULD, by God, make the major leagues, because he was tired of everybody selling him short, saying he had no stuff, or he was too small or too weak or just 'not like that nice Maddux boy', and he'd be damned if he was gonna end up…

"No idea what you're talking about, lady."—Harvey Updyke