I bet he just can't wait to to break tackles as an actual (uncompensated) video game character.

"a very cool stunt that I'd like to have documented by a reputable news outlet."

PARTY HARD

If they do murder people or cause violent harm, that's not cool

"Ha! You call that ruining a mock draft?!"

Harrelson: "Sorry about that folks, got a little confused there. Boy, those unintelligible homers sure are the worst, huh?"

Phil Roth is undoubtedly grateful for the page hits. What Phil Roth is probably not grateful for are the words "Phil Roth's wonderful little tool."

Wounded Knee.

Puig should really appreciate the opportunity. Most Cuban defectors would of LOVED to have gotten in on a sub.

Your first sentence is wrong, wrong, wrong. Hot Fuzz is easily one of my favorite movies of all time and I much prefer it to Shaun of the Dead. It's a great riff on the typical buddy cop movie and the ending shoot-out is lots of fun. I'd rant more but I have to try and beat traffic....

Orange you glad it was a 'mad at the Giants' banana?

As Deadspin commenters, you'd think we'd show some sympathy for fellow throwers of low-hanging fruit.

Elin Nordegren: [driving by Tiger's house at 5mph]

the screws can run as much as $1,000 a pop.

TMZ says the sag in Woods's house is limited to the dining room area.

Unfortunately, after the game, he drowned in the deep end of the pool named after him.

Yeah, that's the idea. Free A-Rod.

They later shot and killed Mark Eaton during s'mores time thinking he was Sasquatch.

He'll miss such valuable sessions as:

"So THIS is the view from 13.5 games behind."