Unfortunately, I'd be willing to bet that a large portion of the bump in whiskey sales we're seeing are due to this questionable character...

I don't think it's really dated for a middle-aged woman from the hood who has just been released from prison after a 17 year stint. It's actually, pretty spot on perfect. She's not going to dress like Goop or like the young black kids today (think Tinashe, Minaj, etc) because she's not a youth.

I'm not aware of which decade the show is in, and I was hoping to tell by the fashion but I still can't. Is it the 1990s, 2000s or 2010s? Is it taking place in the contemporary world? If so, these clothes are actually really dated. Am I the only one that is underwhelmed?

Maybe I need to watch the show for context.

'You're just totes jealous you didn't get in'

"Jezebel is always making out the Greek system to be so terrible, my experience wasn't like that!"

Obviously the steak fajitas had not been grilled enough. The longer you grill them, the more tender they become. Look it up.

And the Oscar for Bestest Use Of A Kitchenette Inside Joke in a Horrible Customer Story goes to ...

Monogrammed Thermosery

I want a goddamn coffee latte in a goddamn monogrammed thermos right now!!!! And God help you if there's any red in there because I'm allergic to red!

Speculoos isn't a brand, it's a type of Dutch cookie, so that's just the flavor it comes in. If you don't like it I think the other chocolate cookie core ice cream is the one for you.

Bangs Cruiserbike. You know, if it's a boy.

Any guesses on the names?

I'm going with Masonjar Flowercrown or Ukelele Peterpancollar.

I'm so upset you got here before I did. I was going to tell you all about my ancestor.

That last story: Listen. When you haven't even yet graduated from your expensive college and you're already choosing to go have your limbs mangled for free during an 8 hour shift that a bunch of rich people have paid a small fortune for? That's when you change your career. That's why the romanticizing of the…

Yeah, that knife is never going to be really, truly sharp again. She knows how to get even. She probably even threw it in the dishwasher afterwards.

It's not wild broccoli.

I love these.

But the merchant was a very important person. He sold monogramed thermos clay jugs.

Ladies and gentleman, I give you the tale of Saint Basil Fuckoff, the patron saint of waiters and bartenders.

Finally! Someone with the courage to affirmatively identify the restaurant without playing silly guessing games like "it's named after a town that's in the same state as another town that provided the name for a famous soap opera" or some equally asinine riddle.