I watched a smidgen of the interview (before my gag reflex kicked in) and she was constantly whispering lines to him in her creepy baby doll voice.

“sometimes I take a poop in my hand and then eat it”

Jim Bob is asking Jesus for advice right now, and Jesus is all

Gotta “blog entry” about something, Kevin

It’s not a threat, it’s a helpful offer. He pretty much said he wanted to be martyred, we’re just tryin’ to help.

Not an good writer.

Joni Mitchell is in a coma and unresponsive

I am so old that I no longer know shit at all. I do, however, know this: if they ever make a biopic about Courtney Barnett, Masie Williams should play her because they totally look alike.

He made $900 a month?! So the allure of doing this was just to be a complete jackass objectifying women? I don’t get it.

Sucks to suck, asshole.

I hate that I'm typing this, but GWB was better looking than Ted Cruz.

This is the meanest thing because I am sure he can't (entirely) help it, but I HATE his face. I think it's something about the eyebrows that makes him look like he is always making a "sympathetic" face, in which "sympathetic" deserves quotation marks and he is really being aggressively condescending. Throw in a small…

Jeez, Ted. Come on, it's all in good fun.

This is going to sound horrible, BUT. No man that unattractive will ever be president in todays day and age.

yew ghuyz are being v mean maybe he almost drowned in a sea of well tailored suits as a child and can never be near one again and you're just bullying him rn with your eyes and true words.

Regularly fluctuating weight and limb length? I hate those short arm days.

Vincent Adultman!

To be fair: he's Canadian.

"One oval-shaped suit, please."

It probably hasn't occurred to you, but my guess is he has chosen this "everyman can't afford a good tailor" wardrobe on purpose.