Yeah, damn those Millenials for giving us Quentin Tarantino and Hannibal. Wait, what?

True story. My sister once raised money to save the Brazilian Rain Forest despite the fact that she’s not, in fact, a marmoset.

No, its Becky

I have thrown out a bag of salad every week for the last million years.

hey man, lay off the americans. after all they’re not the ones who are, state by state making it illegal to even feed the homeless through charity.

there are so many b’way shows i want to see but instead i’ll just keep seeing hedwig with different leads. omg taye diggs is going to be amaaaaazing.

My cat wakes me up with the sounds of her profound existential anxiety.

Beverly flat-lined, not Deacon. She is dead, dead, dead. Dr. Prettyboy saved Deacon to live in guilt and idealize his martyr sister forevermore. That’s why the girls liked Beverly, and why she mentioned moving to Nashville to play happy extended families, so when she dies they’ll be sad and it won’t feel like she was…

I like using the toaster oven for this. I make a little tray out of tin foil, then set it to ‘toast’ or ‘broil’. Works perfectly every time and no oil needed!

I clicked hoping to read something about a “moo” point.

I love anything with an unnecessary hood. It is a weakness.

I think Natalie Portman has earned it.

“Keep that p***y tight while I’m gone.”

its like i want to explain how the two aren’t the same but i dont have the energy

I've always found that registering my car helps keep me out of this kind of trouble.

Oh yeah, Sartre! Sorry everyone, we're shutting this blog down because Sartre already happened. It was fun while it lasted.

I feel ya! Try using thin stainless steel chain, it's cheaper than silver and you won't need to worry about allergies.

If people are booing you, I wouldn't really consider them fans.