"I have always held a suspicion that Ellen Degeneres is actually kind of evil." You know you might have something here Mark. There is a resemblance.

Frankly, if I could afford $50 per WEEK, I wouldn't have issues with saving money.

according to this instagram, any time the police are called the police show up and just go '...guys...' and everyone calms down and apologizes and then leaves.

She wants a man like Putin

this is why i only ever hook up with the girls from tinder because one time i hooked up w/ this guy

Perhaps white person giver? Since, you know, we were the ones who kept promising native americans things and then taking them back when it suited our whims. Also, it doesn't matter if you meant the phrase to be racist or not, it's a racist phrase. Just like you can't use a racial slur whether you mean it to be racist…

It's funny because it's hard to imagine the men described in the study until one shows up in the comment, just, makin' a scene.

The earlier reports of shots that prompted tear gas seemed to have been fireworks... this shit is unreal.

This was my favorite.

I get the impression this happened a lot. I remember teachers telling me all these crazy stories about brontosauruses and triceratopses and Pluto, the 9th Planet. It was bullshit, man. All bullshit.

Everyone is so distracted by the computers in their heads that they don't notice the world is dying around them. Published years before smart phones were so rampant, today it just feels a little too plausible and bleak, especially considering how feverishly people debate the importance of helping the environment.…

Im sorry. This just makes me hate you. I'm a bitter person.

Oh hey you had two older brothers and you say the Ouija board seemed to just "know" things about you? IT'S A MYSTERY

I like where your head's at. Although maybe not for Tony. The facial hair invalidates her performance.

You know, I'm just tired of this. I'm tired of being told I can't protect myself from an unwanted pregnancy. I'm tired of being told I can't have sex that doesn't result in a baby. I'm tired of being told that when I'm pregnant I'm a liability. I'm tired of being told that when I'm having a baby, I won't necessarily…

OMG I love everything about this commercial.

That is no excuse, no exemption from work and from duty! I was drying dishes, the day I was born. And I had to have the trick with the silverware right! None of this one-at-a-time thing. I had to be stuffing turkeys by the third day. Oven cleaning was on the same day. No time for naps.By day 6, I had expelled my…

You do realize that Goodwill is able to pay it's employees under minimum wage. because they employ the disabled, people who are already often taken advantage of, and are trying to make it on a barely livable income are then forced to work on .25 to .50 cents and hour. Thats a sweatshop. http://thinkprogress.org/economy…

It is unfortunate that the Moto X didn't catch on more.