You mean his ceiling is only that of an 8-time All Star? How dare these people hype him!

Lets call it what it is. Begging on the internet. 

“If he wanted us to go into a game he would pull our ponytail and drag us to the scorer’s table.

Ladies and gentlemen, may I present the new University of Maryland football coach.

“Yeah. Threatened.”

I think he meant more like a daddy figure.

“I regret the fact I tried to be a father figure.”

Yeah, I’ve been avoiding watching Oakland Raiders games this season too.

that explains why his arms are empty

Right? It’s the 5th highest grossing domestic R-rated movie of 2008 for Christ’s sake!

Tropic Thunder not that popular?  What the hell are you talking about?

You can see clearly at 0:38 that Cousins comes down with all his weight onto Bennett. This absolutely should be a foul of roughing the rusher.

but if the spirit of the rule is to protect players—which clearly did not happen here—then why wasn’t something even temporarily called?

Please shut the fuck up.

I’m going to enjoy his full page ad in the newspaper when he leaves town. “I loved the team, it’s just that your town is a boring shit hole.”

Get a job as a pig, and make no arrests in a month, and see how long you stay there.

I especially like the part where the officer told him that if he stood out there and lied about the law that he’d get in a whole lot of trouble.

More people should be ticketed for littering when they toss cigarette butts on the ground.

“A lot of people have gotten into a lot of trouble assuming that police officers have their best interests [at heart].”

Were they just gonna throw him in the ice bath and then leave him there unsupervised?