It would be like me saying “Courtney is my best friend” and then me getting news of Courtney’s life from an old MySpace page

I know how much people hate the meme, but holy crap, this is going too far.

You might as well have called this one 10,000 ways to burn your mouth.

Wendy has always been a horrible person in my book. Please go somewhere and shut the fuck up forever.

Sorry, but Jesus Christ, who cares?

Yeah, I agree. Thanks. And I’d like to take this opportunity to say to all the people commenting “They got insulted and still stayed??” that there are lots of places in America where this is the norm. And if you don’t fake smile and stay, then you end up at home with Top Ramen.

Snap Poll:

How many of you originally thought the man was the groom?

I did.

Every time I see or hear the phrase "cheddar bay biscuits," my mind immediately goes to an image of a body of water tinted yellow, with string cheese seaweed and crabs made out of cheese wheels scurrying about. Kinda like how Homer Simpson envisions Flushing Meadows as a knoll covered with with actual toilets in the…

Easily a *chafed* or *chapped* old hag after sitting astride that wrecking ball for so long (I mean, something's gotta give). Not sure about *crusty*, though, at least in that video context.

Wait, Miley Cyrus still has fans? My mind is blown.

It's a popcorn dress! I bet it gets all tiny when she takes it off!

Anything Dick Bag Trump says:

That always infuriates me. "If anyone was offended" my ass, you already know people were offended! That's why you're being asked to apologize!

Albert, you know I love you, but ranking yellow mustard above spicy brown means you're either a psychopathic criminal or horrible things were done to you as a child. Or both.

I hate that I know so much about this dumb show and I hope this model girl ends up working the floor at a Wet Seal.

I need to start eating at different restaurants.

...where the hell are you eating? ;-)

Yet some people really do learn better in an academic setting.

There's a link on that Kris Jenner article to a slideshow called "Chunky Ham Hocks: 10 Female Celebs with Cankles."

Lampanelli is SUCH a jerk. Haterade is 90% you-so-jealous, grrrrl.