As an old Californian, thank God. I hope cap sleeves are permanently done away with.

Aw. Sweet and sad story. He must have been so lonely.

This is what we are coming to - the idea that just because you work full-time at a skilled job and have a college education doesn’t mean you get to expect a decent standard of living.

I lived in 400 sf with a large dog, just the two of us, and I thought it was pushing it for the minimum amount of space I would want to live in. There was about 18" of counter space in the kitchen, no storage in the bathroom other than a small space under the sink, and I couldn’t buy bulk anything. So I’d have to buy…

Yes, we had those, too. We had matinees every day, so for the matinee price of a couple bucks, someone could come in and have a comfy (if not Junior Mint-stained) seat, a roof over their head, and a clean bathroom for 10 or more hours.

I was probably 4, which would make my brother 8 and my sister 10.

Drinking Moon Juice smoothies.

THIS. WHY? The dog will get up and stare me in the face all day long until I get the camera out, then I could smear liver on my nose and she wouldn’t look my way.

Haha no.

We were always wearing some popcorn-crusted sneakers, and I think we were too young and dumb to make something up that might have given him a thrill.

When I was a low-paid movie theater employee, we were probably the last theater in the US that actually answered the phone instead of having a recording. We had a regular caller, the foot pervert, who would call, want to know movie times and what shoes we were wearing. He never got sexual or disgusting.

winning

Whenever I see someone with a fart can car, I think “How weak they must be to have a car that makes so much noise. Ooh, look at me! I can make noise like any toddler!” Seems like an obvious sign of serious emotional immaturity.

Me too, and after trying on clothes the other day did something revolutionary, for me, at least.

He also gives the best blowjobs.

That’s why Sqarr can come sit by me.

I feel the opposite. She’s just good fun entertainment. I would probably never buy an...album? Bunch of songs? Whatever it is the kids are doing these days, but I think she’s usually fun to watch.

Mincemeat is always gross.

Step 1: Find terribly wounded people.

So much funny in four paragraphs. “whose palette contains thousands of years of mystic tradition...” Written like a true mystic. A 13-year-old mystic with a spiral notebook and a sparkle gel pen.