God, I hope that "lock him up" chant burned its way into his insecure little facsimile of a soul and we get a torrent of rage tweets about it tomorrow. HOOK IT TO MY VEINS!

I can’t believe the Patriots went to all this trouble to beat the Dolphins.

Nashville is the spiritual home of every suburban girl who claims to be “country at heart” because she owns cowboy boots and her parents are racist.

Ya Gotta Bereave!

BRADY: Just want to say this is for all the haters who thought I was too old, you know, couldn’t get up anymore or finish the job.

Trader Joe’s Trader Joes Organic Fair Trade Breakfast Blend has served me well.

Trader Joe’s Trader Joes Organic Fair Trade Breakfast Blend has served me well.

Greggggg Williams is the Donald Trump of head coaches.

I’m going to take this a step further and declare the Lions the Ass Team of All-Time. Since 1958, only 60 years for those keeping score at home, the Lions have won a TOTAL OF 1 FUCKING PLAYOFF GAME.

I think you meant a migraiine and diiarrhea

Yes, Chris. We all know that guy. But looking objectively, the guy is a marginal NFL quarterback under the best circumstances. Yeah, sure, he had some success and even pulled off some heroics in the playoffs, when it counts the most. But he comes with so much baggage - the kneeling, the outsized media attention, the…

Wow. The Jags are so bad, they’re even having trouble handling the Bills. 

Funny how kneeling during the anthem disrespects the vets, but denying them health benefits is A-OK.

“Horton, Here’s a Poo!”

“Twenty appointees...that’s nine and eleven!”

You don’t even have to go to another sport. The Chicago Bears got rid of cheerleaders back in the 80s and of the many things people complain about with regards to the Bears this is not one of them.

I used to work for a med school and one time at commencement, the dean said something to the graduates I’ve never forgotten:

It was the Os Johnny had trouble with. He had no trouble with the Xs.

for lines like, “Greg came to me late in the day and showed me that you wrote about him in some promiscuous blog of yours,” which has been said to me upwards of 30 times.

So, Matt Patricia is just Fat Mac in a Tommy Bahama shirt, correct?

The fact that these russia loving, humanity hating, classless, cultureless, chinless, dickless, spineless, Garland Merrick blocking, scheming, semi-sentient, greedy blobs of shit with horrible HORRIBLE fitting skin suits have the gall to call anyone else in the entirety of Democracy obstructionist fills me with so…