How about some executive jail time?

“Wood. It’s what’s for dinner.” Doesn’t quite have the same appeal.

Now that I think about it, subsidizing a phone through a wireless carrier is kind of like subsidizing your car though a gas station.

Breaking Norton is a value-add.

5. Rub the whole thing down with Hand Sanitizer. Make sure to wait for the alcohol to evaporate!

Many years ago I lost my first baby to SIDS. This was a couple weeks after her first round of vaccinations. A person pointed this connection out to me shortly after the funeral. I hit that person in the face.

Bullshit questions deserve bullshit answers. “What is your greatest weakness?” really translates into “Give me a reason to NOT hire you.”

Hmm, I like your letter writing strategy, it helps you stand apart, I’m sure.

Jeez, with 90% of the replies here it seems like people expect to be robbed by Sherlock Holmes.

Pedialyte has never helped me the day of the hangover. It helps me if I drink it before I pass out the night before.

I am really impressed with the overall tone of the comments! Lots of opinions, but the discussion is mostly polite and productive. You know, for an internet comments page.

Just like with nuclear power, global warming mitigation, and vaccination, there is a direct correlation between how much you understand the science and how much you support the technology.

Another trick, told to me by a professional, is that the proper fork, spoon, or knife to use with your latest serving is always the one toward the outside. Use utensils from the outside inward.

Yeah, what is it... like $350 for the cheapest model? I honestly thought about flying to Cupertino and see if they’d sell me whatever their execs were smoking. Sadly though, they’ll probably sell millions of them. Apple could put turds in a box, charge $500 for it, and have people lined up around the block. Then do it…

Look at my picture above. I'm no Brad Pitt. But when I was dating online in my 40s I was having no difficulties getting dates.

I like broccoli. :'(

This is horseshit. Plain and simple some dork showing off his expensive stuff. Because I know when I go to my "office job" I always take my $900 Camera and $75 Pen Case...

Carry a multitool, flashlight, and camera around all the time, but not "normal" office gear? Where is a USB flash drive? Business cards? Phone charger (or backup battery)?

Back before my face and body submitted to gravity, I spent two years shaking my ass at a relatively 'classy' chain in the south. We had to wear gowns on the floor while cruisin' for customers, and if some of the more *assertive* ladies happened to catch anyone giving extras in the VIP, they would get the shit kicked…

What my greatest weakness?