Tighten down your hijabs, obedient slaves of Allah, we’re gonna be the men tonight.

Is that a dead mongoose on the table?

I live in the equatorial band most affected by Zika atm. It is island-hopping at a phenomenal rate across the Atlantic and shows no sign of stopping. Do not come here if you are pregnant or could get pregnant — and by that I mean “don’t have potentially impregnating sex” because contraceptives fail — until the…

Because you made it up?

Considering it seems to “happen” to you (the self-professed “beautiful” stranger) over and over again, and the obvious delight you take in reciting the aftermath of your pious actions, it seems you enjoy this particular scenario a great deal — enough that it’s probably entirely imaginary.

Really. Not one of these would look like anything other than an expensive body bag on a Healthy At Any Size woman. It’s offensive.

Yeah. I’m pissed because I forgot “empowered ‘sex worker’” in there, dammit.

Look, lots of us know the problem is every music act can’t be a fully-junked transgender Healthy At Any Size lesbian of color with their own line of Youtube makeup tutorials and plus-size dresses for a buck, so we don’t say anything and just go about our business. The “pleading eyes” thing is your frenzied…

Seriously? Of all things, Macklemore is what makes you “very nervous” for America? Christ how trivial.

I want to see a movie about David Hamilton Jackson (1884-1946), who was a brilliant lawyer, orator, writer, union organizer, and educator in the Virgin Islands. Some call him the “Black Moses” here. He traveled to Copenhagen to face the lions in their den and convinced the Danish King and Parliament to abolish…

Well, considering that all men frequently have large amounts of snot coming out of their . . . wherever, it does seem a little odd to bring that up.

Was Belle Knox in those as well? We all must remember her — the “empowered college student” violent blowjob film prostitute that Jezebel touted for a while.

Bring a hijab.

The word’s utterly ridiculous anyway. Should be ‘kew.’

The dogs bark, the caravan moves on.

Ugh, probably a no-go for me because the MRA manly manly men are having an Internet circle jerk over it.

But Dolce & Gabbana has such beautiful headbags and body shrouds now. Think of all the time you’ll save getting dressed! And when the facemask becomes obligatory to avoid attack, no more money spent on makeup either!

Because hijab (and the other variants of Islamic costuming) aren’t really about “modesty.” That’s a duplicitous description, directed primarily toward kaffir. The Koran, in 33:59, explains that Muslimahs are to draw cloth completely over themselves so that they are recognizable to other Muslims and not be attacked. “O…

Pretty chains are the best jewelry!

Eye-slit niqabs are fantastic when I have a zit, too!