I had to punish my 14 yo niece, made her watch this with me no breaks. Came home one day, she was re-watching it with friends. Turns out pot makes it better.

Carefully and without eye contact.

Perhaps they also pulled him over for fitting ugly after market wheels on an F40

Yeah, the Swiss Guard are great — too bad they stood by as Pope Pius XII (like Switzerland itself) adopted a stance of ‘neutrality’ as the Nazis were massacring millions of people across Europe - real, honorable people, those Swiss and Pope ‘Pius’

If NFL teams want better QB development, maybe they should stop being such cheap asswipes and fund a real minor league instead of relying on a bunch of petty tyrant college coaches that don’t even care about the long term development of their unpaid players

Roethlisberger: “Are we going for two?”

I hope they honor Pedro by giving him the 2002 Cy Young he rightfully deserved.

Jay Cutler has zero chill.

$1.6M for 80* home games.

To be fair, those people are trash humans for the most part

Great. Now I get to listen to everyone in DFW who suddenly overnight became foot surgeons tell me how it won’t take that long to heal.

Double murder, huh? Well, professional baseball may be out of the question now, but he could always be a Super Bowl MVP.

One source said the procedure Pierre-Paul had done Sept. 4 to “close up” his middle finger was still fresh when he met with team doctors on Sept. 7.

In a few weeks we’ll find out Kostek is actually 40 cans of Bud Light in a wig.

He’s not playing football so he can afford to go to college. He is going to college so that he can continue to play football.

He made the much smarter move, "Chicks before dicks" aka survival of the species, while his coaches went with the much more stupid "You wore the wrong shirt, prepare to be hurt." aka girls have cooties club.

Oh, so you mean they’ll either sell it or not sell it? Amazing insights abound in Jalopnikland!

Having worked in local news, I can tell you that if the show is now on 84 times per day just to increase the amount of ad inventory, it means ratings are in the absolute shitter and the only way to increase revenue is make more product.

This was much more fun than the time Adrian Peterson and his sports baby did the whip.