This.

So anyone guilty of the following actions in my presence will get a 72-mph fastball to the ribs:

*Final game of his regular season career**

I consider myself a pretty decent cook, but I absolutely suck at making risotto. They always thicken up way too quickly and I end up trying to balance it out and I shit the bed.

Your Signature Dish DUAN!

Now that's what I call trolling!

This post, is good. +1 grammer joke

I'm just trying to understand your logic here: Is the physical feat of jumping and dunking from the free throw line that much more impressive if it's done in transition from a dribble during a game, or are your trolling abilities just that substandard?

But it's a dunk contest. They're dunking, not fundamental-ing.

Why would anyone ever do this in a game?

+1 for 7 from the stripe.

Had a bit of a wake up call this weekend. Commence not stressing out over bullshit... Now.

Did you buy a new BMW with your last paycheck?

That is one unstable Isotope. He went nuclear.

HOF also stands for "Haslam Owes Fortune."

Eh... you win some, you lose some.

I had to watch that movie for a film critiquing class in college. Hated it, wrote a paper about how much I hated it, debated my point in front of the class with my professor about hating it, and then proceeded to get shitfaced drunk at the end of the semester with said professor.

That court is out of order!

Lest we forget, Alzheimer's is no joking matter.

This is the most correct anyone has ever been in the history of the Gawker brand comment section.