Horniest team? The Swiss, you idiot.

That reminds me of my dad and how he’d drive his IROC-Z onto the court where I was playing youth basketball and skid that thing real close to me while I was trying to shoot a free throw. If I missed, he’d flick a cigarette at me, peel out, and I wouldn’t see him for months. If I made the shot he’d nod at me…

That’s true, but perhaps Cashman is taking a page out of Epstein’s Cub playbook: good bats are harder to come by than good arms. Given the inflated strikeout totals and fragility of young arms, good young bats are a safer and valuable bet than arms. Epstein rationalized that he could always get arms when he needed to,…

sooooo proud <3 <3 <3

This take can melt steel beams.

This is amazing. Who are you trying to parody here? Old racist uncle? Half-hearted Skip Bayless? The reanimated corpse of Andy Rooney?

Scorching hot!

I can undo all of that with one short sentence:

Can we get Univision to shell out for an All Bears sub-blog now? Let some damn good come of this whole mess.

Way easier said than done. For one, not that easy to hit 95 MPH wherever you want to. Not everyone is Tony Gwynn. Second, when shifted,pitchers are only throwing pitches that will likely get pulled, for example, down and in on Big Papi. Not 87 MPH change-ups on the outside corner. The teams have so much data, from…

Benjeahzi.

the four swimmers spoke to U.S. State Department officials and they agreed to shut up. Almost immediately after the briefing, Lochte “walked across the street” and gave an interview

I'm hoping for some sort of James Harrison berserker scorched-earth scenario where he lays waste to the NFL pencilnecks who keep hassling him.

I wasn’t aware Clay Matthews was black and disliked...

Can’t believe how much that Greg Jennings play broke him mentally.

Solution: remove boxing as an olympic event. Replace it with brawling. You lose when you are unconscious or give up. No judging, no bribing.

If General William Tecumseh Sherman would have done a better job, we wouldn’t have to witness this yearly March to Seven and Nine.

Burke is not a millennial! He is a frontiersman.

100%. Drew already mentions soup stew and onion rings, but onions make SO MANY THINGS better. This guy is setting up the obvious strawman “oooh I dont eat onions raw thus they suck”. Come on, guy. You’re not fooling anyone.

Damn kids and your fancy high-tech “oven mitts”. In my day we just grabbed scalding hot trays of oatmeal raisin and gravel cookies (none of this pansy chocolate chip) right out of the oven, and we loved it.