Thank you!

Just try not to leak too much coolant!

I’m taking the New York Bar Exam on Monday... twenty years after graduating law school, and not having practiced law since then. I expect to fail just as miserably as your minivan has failed the TUV. But I will continue undaunted and try again and again until I pass because I am the David Tracy of law. You are my…

This is a ‘I can’t get this heap of shite to work properly’ sale isn’t it.

Pretty sure Futurama made that episode already.

In that moment, Randall stopped owning a Ford Expedition. He picked up his keys, and began gathering the supplies needed to change his status among Apache Junction’s HOA: This is a case of Keystone, a hacksaw, and years of pent up frustration.

They’ll never notice!

Ah, the ad hominem attack. It works so well because it completely ignores matters of right or wrong, true or false, and gets right to the heart of the matter - that the user doesn’t like what their opponent has to say, but has no ability to counter the argument, so will counter the person instead. A true classic.

Where else are you going to put the Porsche crest?

I immediately assume the seller is hiding a lot here by not listing it on a dedicated aircraft site

Listed on Facebook market place? I immediately assume the seller is hiding a lot here by not listing it on a dedicated aircraft site where buyers are presumably much more knowledgeable.

Used cars 15+ years old cannot be resold in China and still be road legal. You can technically keep driving it if you’re the one who bought it within those 15 years, but it has to pass their tough inspections or else it will be considered no longer roadworthy, and good luck getting it re-certified then. So sadly many…

Thank you, I was trying to figure out why the seemed cheap and slightly off, you exactly nailed it.

Nah. Whenever someone starts talking about lit warning lights on a late-model VW, telling me “it’s a basic fix, I just haven’t got around to it”, I start backing away.

A simple, sincere statement instead of a monologue with jokes would have went along way.

What happened to Ellen? Her ass used to be beautiful!

Agreed; I fucked my eyes up plenty of times not wearing goggles (or even safety glasses) when I should have. There were at least 3 or 4 times I had to look at myself cross-eyed in a mirror to pluck a metal splinter out of one of my eyes while my dad watched in horror. I’ve also introduced such nifty chemicals as…

This story has no good guy.

I didn’t know I wanted a Florida Man douchebro vs. Salt Bae fight til I had to write this today.

I think there is probably plenty of room for everyone in this story to be the asshole. That being said...