Before I saw the date I assumed this report was from the last month or so, maybe July at the earliest. But to have the level of despondence a month into the season??? I mean this was the Blue Jays and not the Mets right?

Was Ben Stein at the finish line with a giant bottle of Visine?

Also, this picture is fucking incredible in light of Kedzie's story:

Wow. It looks pretty egregious. Look at this article about sex appeal in MMA:

Thanks, but my knowledge and math are just fine. Just making a joke at the expense of Canada based on incorrect perceptions of Canadian money held by many Americans.

If you get offended easily I suggest you go elsewhere. Perhaps leave the interwebs altogether.

$500 Canadian, so like $5 American?

The driver was driving in a "serpentine manner" at speeds of about 50 mph.

Drew, this column (this specific one on the Jets, not the whole series) is a work of art. I look forward to it every year. You did not disappoint. "Appalachian JaMarcus Russell" alone was worth the price of admission.

"That's not at all what I was hoping for."

Mostly that was a joke poking fun at Abramovich, but as a Chelsea fan, I'd go with Torres and Lukaku over Eto'o for sure. I might even take Schurrle and Ba over Eto'o, because at least Schurrle and Ba have youth on his side, and it'd be nice to see Chelsea develop them a little (although at this point with Eto'o…

A lot of people ask why Chelsea would sign someone like Eto'o when they have so many strikers. Roman Abramovich asks, "why not? I was simply going to light this money on fire anyway."

That's a pretty interesting draw. It feels like every group is either stacked (in order of toughness: F, D, B, H) or incredibly easy (in order of easiness: G, E, C, A). I'm just glad my team falls in the latter category.

I love watching grown men acting like teenage tough guys on twitter.

+1

+1

I have a dream that Macklemore will go down as the greatest rapper of all-time.

I have a dream that the Brooks Brothers Outlet Store is selling khaki chinos in my size.

My God you're an ignorant little twit. The comparisons to Bob Ley were to prove a point that he's not an investigative journalist like Ley, he's an opinion guy, ala Skip Bayless. I wouldn't call that an argument, it's fact.

It appears you clearly have nothing straight. So allow me to set it straight for you. How have I changed my argument three times? Let's see the thrust of my criticism of Keith from my first post in this thread: