his balls look like wounded ducks flopping through the air

Keepin’ it classy again, eh Madristas?

That’s funny, coming from the most effeminate-looking ballplayer since Juwanna Mann.

HE TRAVELLED.

Unless you speed it up and play the Benny Hill theme over top.

You sure about that?

Not a car guy, but really? The Subaru “Sexually Transmitted Infection”? That’s great.

Roll Tide?

I’m thinking that Xi’s secret service was too close for the ol’ “assasination by star footballer at the training pitch” ploy.

That’s what the sub-prime mortgage housing bubble looks like.

Given that the baby and his parents were in the lower section, I’m guessing they couldn’t afford to hire a babysitter. In fact, they probably had to take out a second mortgage to afford those primo seats.

This has to be a troll, because they’re both Paraguayan.

He seems slighty...excited...to be wearing those pyjamas.

Considering you’ve said “offsides”, I tend to believe you actually LOVE being that guy. But what do I know.

‘BOUT TIME.

Excuse me, but it’s Tuesday. Stop fucking around and post the Funbag already.

Gross. Here’s a star.

Lol, Whitey.

Here’s to hoping it’s the Johnny Rotten/Sex Pistols version.