I just went back and watched the original, and it is not the codeine cough syrup talking when I say that other countries must be jealous of our badass first lady.

I kept thinking actress Malin Akerman, and was wondering when she found time to become a conservative blogger.

She had switched seats with her assistant, and it isn't policy to test passengers, since it's perfectly legal for a passenger to be drunk.

I find it absurd no one in Anne's camp suggested switching it to a different Valentino. Even if it wasn't custom for her, at least she would still be sporting the label.

There have been only 8 bachelorettes? I could swear there were dozens, it seems every 'Dancing with the Stars/Celebrity Challenge' game have at least three a season.

I'm not sure why there's even an audience for this kind of thing - it sounds like Kidz Bopz or whatever that collection is that has kids singing popular songs. So high pitched and irritating.

I was getting all ready to indignantly rant about how Mia Wasikowska is part of the famous Wasikowska twins and an out and proud male to female transgender.

Can we all go live in the version of reality this picture came from? Nothing else changes. Except maybe it rains donuts.

LIFE isn't as 'Sex and the City' as I thought it would be...where can I move?

I think the frustrating thing about Rihanna and Chris Brown is that she has a team of people around her, and no one is willing to just lock her in a closet til she gains some sense for fear of stopping the gravy train. It's easier to say yes than to be a real manager/friend/assistant and speak up. I'm pissed that…

My favorite thing is when people say "I don't believe in queers/blacks getting welfare/religious freedom/the Constitution/anti-pot laws." Because your belief makes something real.

It's like a legal battle between two high school mean girls.

I think the issue (at least in my readings) was that 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, Lady Gaga should be able to wake you up or interrupt your dinner or yank you out of the bath to move her shit around, while paying you for a forty hour workweek that was never scheduled, and may be from 2 am-5 am, then 9 am-11 am, then…

Jesus, who has that shit around their house? I'm scared that pickle will come to life at night and hurt me.

From what I understand, it's one of those weird state v. fed things - the federal law says it's legal, but Alabama law says it's not, just like marijuana is legal in certain states but not federally. Therefore, certain courts and law agencies will pursue while others will not.

The bf and I had the best NYE ever - we were both sick so we just drank Robotussin and built Legos all night.

http://youtu.be/ I was going to write a rant about how I could've been dressed like a nun and it wouldn't have been good enough, but instead I will share with you this wonderful Donald Glover piece.

Stoned 'American Dad' viewers UNITE!!

I have a sister 18 months older than me and a brother 20 months younger. I can't believe my mom didn't go crazy - my dad worked 60 hour weeks, and there was no family in town to help out. She is Superwoman.

It's so sad, it sounds like he's more of a babysitter than a lover every time I read the stories about them. Jesus, let her buy the lotion with her billions of dollars, and just fucking donate it next week. Everyone wins - she gets to spend her money harmlessly as she pleases, and poor people get moisturized. She…