You are a god damn genius. Now I'm laying in bed wanting to get up and make that at 11:40pm

No that’s when you get out a sharpie, circle the stain and write the words “worth it” next to the stain.

unless it’s about the stains that are unremovable because silicone lube is the worst...yet best.

also bitch you’ve obviously never tried to have sex while super high on that tip top chronic no lube no sex no fun in that situation

THIS MOVIE MAKES ME ANGRY ENOUGH TO KICK A PLANT.

Granted, this is referring to the US and not the UK.

lol what law skewl did u go 2

I agree, but I don’t think he is the loudest voice. The loudest voice was Amber Rose. Matt is just doing what we ask all allies to do. It seems like Jezebels need to spend sometime being an activist ally to understand that Matt is doing everything right. We need more feminist men like him.

“precum pregnant” is one hell of a bummer of a phrase

so,

One 24-year-old woman told me that her boyfriend broke up with her because ‘he told me that I wasn’t girlfriend material because I had been with 10 guys

I was told to throw personal questions back at people who ask this: “when’s the last time you declared bankruptcy?” “When’s the last time you had an orgasm?” “What’s your credit score? Oh, that’s none of my business? WHAT BETTER ADVICE TO TAKE THAN YOUR OWN??!!”

Incidentally, in the state of New York you have to sign a paper promising you won’t shake your baby before you leave the hospital. It’s good, because it’s part of a larger program to educate parents that shaking a baby can be harmful or deadly, and simple advice to help parents calm themselves down to keep them and…

Wait. Is this from the episode where Samantha catches Richard cheating on her? Because the episode after that is my favorite one. Specifically because of this scene:

I think you know. But which is which?

But how can you manage the oh so hefty weight of those sugar babies on top of you, you sensitive thing, you?

I full out judged them. Like “Wow do you also take food from food banks?” They were incredulous, like stealing from a library is a normal person thing to do.

Fuck it, I’m coming out of my self-imposed Gawker exile because you, sir, pissed me off. WHO gives a SHIT about her fucking moral opinions? WHO is interested in changing this piece of garbage’s mind? All that people are interested in is her upholding the fucking law, as she’s been ordered to do. The law doesn’t give a…

From the linked article, RE: Lunchables: