Not just for Human Centipede articles anymore!

Brad Ausmus would have kept Chapman in the bullpen, in case the game went to extra innings.

“Who’s not throwing dildos: What’s throwing dildos. Who’s fucking a Fleshlight.”

Is this the one where the commentators would just ramble on and get way behind the action?

Crickets. I was told I could order the same product at the current sale price, which was $20 off. No thanks.

Crickets. I was told I could order the same product at the current sale price, which was $20 off. No thanks.

I doubt Amazon will honor those MacBook prices. They had Kindle Paperwhites for $20 a few months ago, so ordered a few for gifts. Next day I got an “oops sorry lol” email from them which cancelled my order.

I doubt Amazon will honor those MacBook prices. They had Kindle Paperwhites for $20 a few months ago, so ordered a…

Isn’t this where somebody gets all riled up and fellates the ‘72 Dolphins with words?

“She’s not a war hero,” said Senator Kirk. “She was a war hero because she lost her legs. I like people who don’t lose their legs.”

Lets him?

We went from a Wrangler Unlimited into a Grand Cherokee when our first was born, because SUV. We quickly went from that SUV into a minivan because it just didn’t cut it. The backseats aren’t that big (while that backward baby seat setup is a monstrosity), and the cargo room in back disappears once you put a stroller…

“Fart with me, Leather.”

The team and league might not care, but I’m curious if this might end up a civil/legal issue. If this happened in the parking lot, he get a ticket for aure.

Wrong story, huh?

Shocker

Cubs fans have to realize: when you win the championship, you aren’t lovable losers anymore. It could get lonely at the top real quick.

Soccer be like

He’s the type of guy who would walk by the chocolate fountain and stick his finger in it for a taste.

“Now Eric, don’t leave your urine anywhere. Some young lady, possibly even a Latino Hispanic, could come along and splash it on her pussy, get pregnant. That’s why they’re called ‘golddiggers’. Everybody knows this.”