To be fair, it was a perfect triple murder with full layout into five pristine felonious somer-assaults.

I feel like none of us really understood how cups actually worked, and what they could or could not do.

Guess what happens when you take all the guns from the workers.  The government busts your union and you’re forced to work for low wages.  

The ball had barely made it past the outside of the post when he heard the shout. Eddy watched as The Nagy, red-faced and foaming at the mouth, marched the young man to the Fifty and forced him to his knees in the center of the C painted on the grass.  

The Tenth Kicker sounds like a dystopian YA novel that is luckily only 30 pages long.

Laces OUT!!!11!111!!!

When discussing Cousins and Alabama, one has to be a little more specific.

“Well you see son, some people are fans of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers but many, many more people are NOT fans of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.”

Christ, I bet it you dig around in Bill O’Briens chin dimple you could find at least half of that amount in spare change.

There are times where contract articles get so deep into the weeds that I feel like at any moment the author might say, “But the Texans’ Maverick can trade lumber for agriculture credits.” and it wouldn’t sound any more made up.

Kaepernick playing behind that line on that team would just validate all of the mouth breathers who said he wasn’t getting signed because he was bad. I would rather not watch him get demolished and then benched in week 7 while the wet president tweets about it.

Peyton’s too busy making shitty commercials that make me long for Cheryl’s She-Shed. TV was a mistake.

Why would we want to punish him further by making him live in Indiana?

Brock Osweiler played in seven(!) games for my favorite team last season, and yet somehow my brain managed to completely suppress that memory until I saw that header photo and it all came rushing back. I feel like Guy Pierce in Memento right now. But instead of a Brock Osweiler tattoo I just have a mole that looks…

“Sure, we could have demanded he pay us the money back. But that didn’t feel like the right thing to do. Andrew was more than just our quarterback, he was the person we rallied around after we let Peyton Manning go He brought us together: our present, our future and our glorious past. From our point of view, he helped…

Starred but also BOOOOOOOO

Surprising to see him get the sack as an edge rusher; usually Peace comes from within.

I wonder how well the Seattle Cobains could run a shotgun formation

Wait, remind me again which sect of American politics supports gun violence?

The article said the QB framed an innocent man. Roethlisberger isn’t bright enough to frame a photograph, let alone a human being for a crime.