And of course, “republican” meant something entirely different in France at the time, I suspect.

One of the local arthouse cinemas sells a drink size that is, “I am large; I contain multitudes.”

I adore that people tried to help you out here.

Besides, of COURSE I would want cheese on my cheese.

...have you ever been to a McDonald’s before?

My little brother and I talked about opening a coffee shop just so we could come up with our coffee sizes. Decaf would not be an option. Starting at 12 oz (that’s right, the smallest cup we would sell is 12 oz, man up buttercup) and increasing in 4 oz increments:

Because not everyone shares your tastes?

(Editor’s Note: I have serious feels about “Tall” being the name for a fucking Small and “Grande” being a goddamned Medium. Fuck you, Starbucks, I will order a Large, not a Venti, and you will FUCKING LIKE IT)

How else are you supposed to unhook a bra?

The only correct response to that is “Get. Out.”

No, it makes perfect sense. They also serve Chili (chips with melted cheese and guacamole), hot dogs (round patties of ground beef on a round bun), and turkey sandwiches (sandwiches made with ham).

now this is a Satan i can worship..

I was a teen working at a Golden Arches

She still makes a show of weighing the cup and declares it not dry enough.

Is this attitude THE WORST? Can you not think of worse attitudes? Or did you not believe that there was enough hyperbole on the internet already?

“how am i supposed to eat my french fries?”

He gave me the ol’ “If you’re not a liberal in your 20s you got no heart, if you’re not a conservative by your 40s you got no brains” speech more than once.

Starbucks has positively sensible naming conventions compared to a beer bar I worked in. Instead of listing the ounces, they named the four sizes pilsner, draught, tall boy, and hofbrau, which were 12, 18, 26, and 38 ounces respectively.The first of these is a type of beer, the middle two are serving styles that do…

DAMN IT. I want pizza now and there is none to be had.